When you're in the business of singing telegrams, birthdays are your bread and butter. But we love celebrating all kinds of special occasions: anniversaries, promotions, Valentine's Day, graduations, vasectomies, Easter, baby showers, Admin Professionals Day, gender reveals, St. Patrick's, retirements, April Fool's, chemotherapy completion and even cornhole victories in the Cayman Islands. No celebration is too niche for Custom Singing Telegrams. May the Fourth, also known as Star Wars Day, is a perfect example. May the Fourth began when fans realized “May the fourth be with you” was a slight play on George Lucas' endlessly quotable catchphrase “May the force be with you.” Considering April showers are about to bring May flowers, May the Fourth is on the event horizon. Sci-fi fans around the planet are planning to celebrate in myriad ways this Saturday. Is there a hardcore Star Wars fan in your life? Why not enlist a singing Yoda to perform Weird Al's legendary ode to the little green Jedi? The lounge singer-inspired parody of John Williams' theme music, performed by Bill Murray on SNL, is another tune in our repertoire. Interested in further information? Contact us via telepathy (that or our contact page).
And whether we celebrate it with you or not, May the fourth be with you.
The singing telegram, utilized to celebrate birthdays around the world, just celebrated a birthday of its own. It’s 86 years old. Here’s the tale of a truly special delivery.
Like a caterpillar preparing for its radical metamorphosis, I devoured 2018 with zeal. Over four hundred twenty singing telegrams were delivered via my singing telegram agency this year, the majority of which I personally performed (though mad love to my whole roster). I entertained in China for the first time (then returned a mere six months later), visited the Indonesian island of Bali and finalized my upcoming single “Butterflies” at Colorado’s Grammy-winning Airshow Mastering. Below is a smattering of highlights (words and images) cherry-picked from a bliss-filled year of playing dress up, enabling joy through music and hopscotching around Earth's curvaceous body.
Bathing elephants at Thailand elephant sanctuary
Booking world-famous belly dancer Sadie for a holiday samba gig
Carving Godzilla-shaped “Orangami” for fellow performers in Tokyo
Celebrating ten years of performing with world-renowned music promoter Insomniac Events
Character performance at Colorado’s legendary Red Rocks Amphitheater for Seven Lions
Climbing Sticky Waterfall near Chiang Mai, Thailand
Clowning on stilts in China (twice) and Japan
Dancing on stilts at Washington state's stunning Gorge Amphitheatre for Paradiso Festival
Delivering singing resume to iHeartMedia office on behalf of creative job applicant
Driving camper van to California's Lightning in a Bottle festival with Suze Q
Experiencing Fungineers' Ice Cream Truck show with Alexandria Baker
Exploring bioluminescence exhibit at Denver Museum of Nature & Science with my nephew Kai
Filming EDC China trailer on seventh floor balcony of Shanghai's W Hotel
Facilitating 420 plus singing telegrams through my singing telegram agency:)
Finalizing my upcoming single “Butterflies” at Colorado’s Grammy-winning Airshow Mastering
Floating above the heads of Mexico City festival goers as a stilt-elevated fish
Greeting Denver Dia de los Muertos revelers - on stilts - at Los Muertos Fantasticos
Hovering six to eight feet above Bali’s Tanjung Benoa Bay on a water-propelled Flyboard
Impersonating Hunter S. Thompson at Cannabition Cannabis Museum in Vegas
Impressing Insomniac CEO Pasquale Rotella on the dance floor with Angelique
Imbibing bug bites in a cave restaurant near Mexican pyramid complex Teotihuacan
Imbibing dragonfruit in both Bali and China
Insomniac Thanksgiving banquet at China’s Chimelong Ocean Kingdom
Landing the cover of The Vail Daily as a stilt-enhanced Uncle Sam
Meeting Portland singing telegram / stilt performer / kindred spirit Jon Dutch in Aspen
Musically ambushing Fox 21 news anchors as singer Barry Manilow
Musically ambushing 9 News anchor Liz Kotalik as Cupid
Nicknaming Mexico's Chichen Itza Mayan ruins “Chicken Pizza”
Organizing nine singing telegrams in a single night for Colorado chapter of Young Presidents
Parasailing above Patong Beach in Thailand
People watching at Lefthand Brewery's voodoo-themed Nitro Fest
Playing EDM Unplugged in VIP speakeasy at Electric Daisy Carnival Las Vegas
Practicing AcroYoga with my Flight Club family
Pretending to defecate on the dance floor at Bassnectar with Michelle
Rapping Cypress Hill at AEG Live Rocky Mountain offices as a tutu-clad gorilla
Seeing both Janelle Monae and Lauryn Hill live in concert
Singing Janelle Monae's “Yoga” for Buti yoga teacher Ashton August and her class
Shooting “Butterflies” imagery with longtime photographer friend Jonathan Shoup
Snorkeling in both Bali and Mexico
Taking my four-legged stilt unicorn on the road with Unicorn Whisperer Anastasia
Terrifying Escape Halloween haunted house visitors as faceless giant Slender Man
Three person ukulele jam session on The Great Wall of China
Winning Temple Nightclub's $500 Halloween costume contest with Future
Zip-lining through the jungle at Tarzan Adventure Phuket in Thailand
Follow along with future adventures via Instagram
Would you like to do something special for your lover? Ever considered surprising your special someone with a singing telegram? Custom Singing Telegrams is offering a handful of Denver area lovers the unique opportunity to gift their significant others a singing telegram, free of charge. What's the catch? Singing telegram recipients would be filmed for the purposes of an Orange peel moses music video. If you think your lover would be thrilled about being ambushed for the purposes of a music video, send an email to email@example.com describing the nature of your relationship (including 3-5 pictures), amount of time you've been together, specific locations (office, park, workplace, house, hospital, restaurant, etc.) where you would want to surprise your lover (getting permission to film there would be essential), along with a link to expressive video footage of the proposed recipient with “Music Video Casting” in the subject field by Monday, October 29.
Let’s make something worth sharing:)
Late Late show host James Corden and actor/singer Neil Patrick Harris joined forces to ambush a few unsuspecting folks with personalized singing telegrams. Watch the hilarity ensue below.
I was born to do singing telegrams. And although I've had many unique, creative ideas over the years, some of my most memorable routines have been collaborations with my customers. Planning a hilarious surprise for recent recipient Nicole Isaacson is a great example.
Nicole was turning twenty-one and her parents wanted to embarrass her in front of her friends. Her mother knew that she liked EDM, so I suggested Daft Punk's celebratory “One More Time” as one of the songs I should definitely perform. Nicole's parents and I debated a bit about what costume would be best. Lady Gaga was suggested (Nicole is a big fan). Although I've assembled a killer Gaga ensemble before, several key costume pieces were borrowed from my friend Staza (and I wasn't sure I'd be able to procure them on such short notice). The Cop was brought up as a possibility. Nicole's dad was hesitant that the character would remind his daughter of a slightly jarring past experience involving a policeman, though. Then Nicole's mom had an idea: what if the Cop asked Nicole to relinquish her fake I.D.? Bingo.
Because I'd gotten the stink-eye from a security guard the last time I'd sung at the venue where Nicole was celebrating her twenty-first (I think he had assumed I was a street musician who'd wandered in to solicit tips from strangers), her mom called ahead to give someone a heads up. I checked in with the manager downstairs upon arrival. “You're looking for the girl in the green side cut out dress – it's very obvious she's not wearing any underwear,” explained the manager. “This is gonna be P.G., right?” One of the funniest aspects of being a singing cop is that people often worry I'm going to be a stripper. It can be fun to play with those expectations a little when it's appropriate. I assured the manager that my shtick was going to be P.G. Implying decency was especially important on this particular occasion, he replied, “Because the owner's upstairs having dinner with his family.”
Guitar slung over my police uniform, I ascended the stairs to the second floor. To the next level is exactly where I hoped this gig was headed. Nicole's friends were obviously expecting me – they pointed her out as soon as I rounded the corner. I strolled over to the birthday girl. “Nicole Isaacson?” I asked. She was taken aback. Her friends were on the edge of their seats. “This is your twenty-first birthday party, correct?” I inquired, setting up the coming punchline. The anticipation was palpable. “Would you like to relinquish your fake I.D.?” I asked smiling. “You won't be needing it anymore.”
My man in blue singing telegrams almost always kickoff with Inner Circle's “Bad Boys.” I launched into the theme song for the TV show Cops. Nicole was probably in shock, as is often the case with singing telegram recipients. Someone noticed the business card I had threaded through my guitar strings that implicated Nicole’s parents as the pranksters responsible and pointed it out to her. Understanding who was behind the hilarious surprise probably didn't make it any less shocking. A birthday rap called “Birthday Party” by Grandmaster Flash & The Furious Five was next up in my medley. I drummed on the strings of the guitar, utilizing it as a percussion instrument of sorts. There are certainly many more talented rappers out there, but singing telegram spectators are generally impressed by my verbal flow. Nicole's friends were entertained.
The moment had come for Daft Punk's “One More Time.” Hearing EDM played on an acoustic guitar generally throws people for a loop. Putting a familiar tune and lyrics in a new context is fun, though. I wrapped up a short version of “One More Time” and her friends kept egging me on. “One more song,” some of them piped up. So I played the first verse and chorus of Lady Gaga's “Born This Way.” Then I led the group in a traditional version of “Happy Birthday.” When I was finally finished singing, Nicole got out of her chair to come over and pose for a photo with her singing cop.
Surprising the birthday girl was a hoot. But that's not the end of the story. I descended the stairs, where I found the manager I'd encountered upon my arrival ten minutes or so earlier. “My performance was more P.G. than the birthday's girl's outfit,” I joked. “You know what's funny?” he replied. “After we touched base, I radioed up to the owner to let him know that a singing telegram was on his way up but that you’d promised to keep it P.G. The owner said if you didn't abide by that promise, he would literally tackle you. It turns out the chef overheard this exchange via his own walkie talkie in the kitchen. During the performance, said chef got on the walkie and said 'The pants are off!' The owner immediately started sprinting toward the table where you were performing.”
“See? It's fun for all involved,” I said, smiling.
Valentine's Day is the Super Bowl of the singing telegram universe. Orange peel and his Custom Singing Telegrams cohort Melissa Ivey have been featured on local TV and radio a number of times in conjunction with the lovers' holiday. Click on the image above to relive a few of the highlights:)
I've performed some pretty funny singing telegrams over the years, but this Funny or Die short featuring Brittany Snow is def LOL-inducing:)
National Boss Day is coming this Monday, October 16. Does your employer or superior deserve to be celebrated or embarrassed? Custom Singing Telegrams can help:) Suck up with a vampire singing telegram. Or earn brownie points with a costumed delivery of baked treats. Call us today at (303) 931-8466 to brainstorm some more:)
Know someone who was born on St. Paddy's? Wanna embarrass someone just for the fun of it? Check out the Irish-ish singing telegram that Orange peel performed at Webroot a few years ago:)
SINGERS: Want to get paid to dress up in costumes and perform at offices, restaurants, hospitals and house parties? Custom Singing Telegrams is currently looking for talented, confident and versatile singers for its roster. Must be able to project without a microphone and have reliable transportation. Ability to play an instrument, rap and/or compose lyrics a plus. Interested candidates can submit a YouTube or Vimeo link of themselves performing a version of The Beatles' "Birthday" - a capella or with guitar or ukulele accompaniment preferred - along with another of themselves telling a joke to firstname.lastname@example.org with the subject "Singer Audition - Your Name." Overachievers are invited to include a clip of themselves rapping.